


Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want

by Arden_Flynn



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bullying, Dark Arts, Drarry, EWE, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, Fluff, Heartbreak, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Hurt/Comfort, Jealousy, Love, Love makes people do crazy things, M/M, Malice - Freeform, Masturbation, Needy Draco, Oblivious Harry, Pining Draco, Post-War, Rejection, Revenge, Short Story, Unrequited Love, alone draco, prejudices, psychotic depression, shunned draco, unrest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-13
Updated: 2016-07-24
Packaged: 2018-07-14 19:57:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 12,953
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7187978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arden_Flynn/pseuds/Arden_Flynn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Haven't had a dream in a long time, see the life I've had can make a good man bad.<br/>So for once in my life, let me get what I want. Lord knows it'd be the first time.<br/>Lord knows it'd be the first time.<br/>*    *    *<br/>For Draco, Harry represents the one thing this rich teen has always wanted: love. Draco's greatest fear is dying alone without it.<br/>Harry has always had people to love, and to love him; but he's never been <i>in</i> love.<br/>Could a malicious desire for revenge be the thing to change all that?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Draco honestly never thought he'd be back here, sitting in the Great Hall under floating candles, surrounded by laughing witches and wizards, all waiting for the Headmistress's address to start the year- and dinner. There was a comforting normalcy to it all, aside from the fact that Draco no longer sat surrounded by admiring Slytherins, hanging off his every word. Ever since the end of the War, he'd been distant with his house. 

At first he thought they'd shun him for his family's betrayal, but found that very few were actually in the cause voluntarily. Most were in because of their parents forcing them (like in his case) or because they and their family had no choice. When Draco returned to school most of his house were polite or completely indifferent to him. However Draco had no time for conversation, despite little hostilities, he still felt out of place and guilty at Hogwarts. He was just here to complete his schooling so he could re-enter the world. 

"Hey Malfoy- didn't expect to see you here- shouldn't you be sniveling from the Ministry with the rest of your folks?"

"Shut it Zabini," Blaise, Pansy and a few others, were the ones that would openly threaten him. 

Draco groaned internally as he felt Blaise slide up next to him, "What do you want?" 

Blaise snickered, "Well, I just wanted to know what makes you think you can continue to associate with us after that display in the War? Shouldn't you be cuddled up next to the Golden Boy and his fan club?" 

Draco's heart skipped a beat, "Oh fuck off!" He got up in a huff and elbowed his way out the Great Hall- he'd quite lost his appetite. 

"Oof!" Draco found himself sprawled on the ground in a tangle of limbs, with everyone in a ten metre radius laughing at him. Even though his house understood his predicament- as many of them were in the same- the rest of the school didn't know what he'd gone through or why he'd gone through with it. They didn't understand that once your family were Death Eaters, even if it was just one or two people, everyone was at risk unless they bowed to the Dark Lord. They didn't understood that he had had _no choice._

None of the Wizarding World could empathise and they never would, but he was past caring at this point.

"Geez Malfoy- didn't see you there!" Draco paused and looked up, "Here- let me help." 

Draco's heart pounded in his chest. He never understood how Harry could go around with such an unguarded expression, handing out kindnesses without consequence. He let his eyes take in the Hero of the Wizarding World- he really did clean up nicely even after coming back from the dead. The boy slipped his hand into the others, and his heart gave a mournful thump. This really wasn't helping his resolve to keep his head down. 

Harry's hand was warm and calloused and- he blushed- so nice and big. Draco could feel the other boy's body heat radiating towards him and he couldn't help but lean towards Harry as he was pulled up.

"Thanks Potter..." 

Draco couldn't look up, he just didn't trust himself not to get...distracted. Instead he settled for looking down at his shoes and pulling at his robes. He must look like such a fool, practically shaking under Harry's firm gaze.

"Hey Malfoy-" Draco gasped as he felt Harry's hand on his shoulder, he instinctively flicked it away and hurried out. 

"Just let the git be Harry," He heard Weasley say to his back, but he kept walking. His aim was to get down to the Dungeons before the rest of his house and put a locking charm on his curtains. Draco hadn't ever been touched by Harry...in real life at least. He shuddered and cast a silencing charm on for good measure.

* * * 

"Today we will be creating the Draught of Living Death," Snape drawled, "This is an extremely dangerous potion that renders the drinker into a sleep comparable to death."

Potions was no longer segregated into houses because of so few students returning for eighth year. The classroom was dotted with not only Gryffindors and Slytherins, but Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs too. Everyone was excitedly catching up and filling each other in on their holidays. Draco would probably be bragging about something or other, instead, he yawned and rested his head on one hand. He sat all alone in the corner trying not to fall asleep- not like he had anyone to brag to. 

"Would anyone care to tell me the name of the potion that is known to reverse the effects?"

The door flung open, revealing one flustered Harry Potter- late for class, "I'm sorry sir, the alarm charm I set didn't work and-"

"Ah Mr Potter here," Snape smiled like a snake, "has just volunteered."

Harry blinked in confusion and asked cautiously, "Volunteered for what?"

His peers were all clearly holding in giggles, Draco observed, as he flipped to the section on sleeping draughts. Even he bit back a smile himself; Harry had no idea how many bad moods he'd taken Draco out of. _"Wiggenweld Potion is a healing potion capable of waking someone from a magically induced sleep."_

"10 points from Gryffindor for tardiness."

Draco was engrossed in reading about the Valerian Root, so he practically jumped out of his skin when he felt someone's breath on his neck. 

"Um Malfoy...?"

Of course it was Harry Freaking Potter. He sat on his hands to hide their shaking.

"What is it Potter?" Draco inquired of his textbook.

"Er, could you tell me what we're doing? Since we're partners and all."

Draco looked up at that, into sparkling emerald eyes. He felt his ears go red, "What are you talking about Potter?" Draco whispered distractedly; he'd never really gotten the chance to look at Harry's eyes. Draco had always been satisfied in calling them green, but they were a little bluer and a lot deeper than he'd thought. They were beautiful from afar, but dark and brooding up close; like the ocean. Harry had little oceans and Draco wanted them to enfold him. 

"-and what was with Snape and the volunteering thing? Malfoy!" Harry woke him out of his reverie and Draco flushed; he'd been day dreaming about Potter's bloody eyes. Stupid bloody beautiful things.

Fuck. 

"Uh he was just talking about the Draught of Living Death and it's antidote, Wiggenweld Potion," Harry was nodding in earnest and Draco bit his lip.

"Wait, what was that about us being partners Potter?"

"Oh! Er well I just assumed 'cause yours was the only bench empty."

"Yeah." 

'There'll always be an empty spot for you Harry,' Draco thought bitterly and surveyed the class he used to have free reign of. 

"So, um, i'll get the ingredients and you can set up the cauldron?" 

"Yeah."

Harry gave Draco an encouraging smile then left for the supply cupboard. Draco's insides withered.

* * * 

Draco Malfoy could not take much more of this. Harry was constantly leaning over him to check the text book, breathing down his neck as Draco added ingredients or inching closer to grab something. Draco was hot and bothered; his hands shook as he cut the Sopophorous bean.

"Here Malfoy, let me do that."

"It's fine Potter."

"Clearly. Your hands are shaking- you're gonna cut yourself. Let me help at least."

Harry put his big, warm hands over Draco's slim, dainty ones and guided them along the beans. Harry's chest was pressed against his back and his arms were around his sides; he could feel every tendon clench and un-clench. Draco could hear Harry's steady heartbeat, compared to his going a mile a minute. Harry blew tantalising breaths against his ear; Draco hyperventilated out through his nose. Every inch of his body burned and there was an aching hunger in the pit of his stomach. Draco closed his eyes.

_Harry ran his hands up Draco's shirt, tweaking his nipples, Draco bit back a moan. "You like that, darling?" Draco nodded, letting out a whimper and trying desperately to keep the sounds in, "Don't hold back Draco sweetie." Harry licked down the shell of his ear all the way to his collarbone; then bit down hard, drawing blood._

"Aaahh!" 

The warmth engulfing him suddenly disappeared, leaving Draco cold, hard and sweaty. He could feel everyone's eyes on him and he gulped- he'd fucking moaned out loud for Merlin's sake!

"Mr Malfoy if you would be so kind as to not interrupt my class."

Draco nodded, thankful that that got everyone back to work. His godfather gave him a concerned look, Draco just shook his head.

"Hey Malfoy, are you okay? What was that?"

Draco sighed; almost everyone, "It was nothing Potter."

"But you...was I holding too tightly?"

"Leave it alone," Draco gritted his teeth. 

"Did I cut you with the knife?" 

Harry reached out for Draco's hands- he flinched away. He couldn't let Harry touch him. He'd find out.

"Malfoy. I cut you, didn't I?"

"Drop it Potter, for Merlin's sake! Can't you just leave things alone? Not everyone needs your help; not everyone needs you to save them!"

Harry dropped his jaw in shock and his eyes flickered with hurt, then he sighed. Draco opened his mouth to apologise- he didn't mean for it to come out like that- but Harry was already back to work. The rest of the lesson passed in a tense silence.

Draco thought about how desperately he wanted Harry; wanted his hands all over him, his smile, his attention, his lips on his. 

Draco thought about how disappointed his father would be.

* * *

It was the somber mood of the place that drew Draco towards the library in the dead of the night. He'd been unable to sleep, all because he'd had that nightmare again. Even in Azkaban his father could still get to him. Draco kicked the wall in frustration; why did he have to be so weak? He blinked back angry tears as the nightmare came flooding back.

_He had no idea where he was, he had only the feeling of being trapped like an animal. His father sat calmly in an elegant chair, it was an unfortunately familiar scene. Lucius sneered at him, "Malfoy's aren't weak Draco; don't you dare tarnish my image." The man stood and his looming figure seemed to rise to the ceiling. Draco shrank back and hit the wall. "How dare you betray me and everything I've worked for?" His father wasn't shouting, but his voice echoed off the walls and came back at Draco with double force. "It is you who have failed, you who have crossed your family and you who have fraternised with the enemy. It is you who deserves this cell in Azkaban." Draco's hands grasped at the wall in desperation, he couldn't breath and he felt like he was dying. Lucius gave a maniacal grin that split his face, "And you know it, don't you?"_

_The older man reached out and gripped Draco's shoulders painfully, turning him to face a mirror. "Blood will always prevail, Draco," His father finished, gripping his forearm, where The Dark Mark pulsed menacingly. White noise filled the room, which now revealed itself as a dark, cramped prison cell. Dementors floated outside the door, it was cold and a numbness spread throughout him. Draco looked up. In the mirror he saw himself, but much older. He looked crazed and animalistic; so thin he was barely there. Tattered prison robes hung off his body, and empty hollow eyes stared back at him. Draco screamed._

It took a moment for him to realise he was curled up on the floor. Draco got up quickly, embarrassed, despite the lack of an audience. He resolved to be in and out as quickly as possible, he didn't like how dark it was...Draco shuddered. He'd completely forgotten what it was he was looking for- Arithmancy book maybe? There was a post-holidays exam Vector always sprung on them. Draco turned the corner into the restricted section and gasped in shock. Books were strewn all over the floor, open at random pages, in crumpled heaps. 

It wasn't the scene in particular that had Draco curious, but the fact that all these books were on Dark Magic. The young wizard crept forward and cautiously lifted a book, but dropped it like fire almost immediately. Draco could feel his blood boil in response to the utter power held between the pages. _"Blood will always prevail."_

Draco stopped. He swore he could hear voices; not his father's. He took out his wand and hurried towards the sound, "Lumos."

Nothing. Merlin's beard he was bonkers. 

_Bang!_

The boy's eyes lit up excitedly- that was definitely a door closing and...running feet! Draco took off running, "Nox," He wanted to be as inconspicuous as one can be whilst sprinting down a hallway. He flew down the stairs. Were they headed for the Astronomy Tower? They'd be trapped there. He slowed to catch his breath. Lungs burning and adrenaline pumping through his veins; Draco felt alive. 

He continued to jog down the hallway in high spirits, then broke into a sprint at the sound of foot steps behind him. They must've came back around, he got his wand ready, then stopped. What was he doing? Draco realised he had no idea what he was going to do if he caught up to them. He was no brave hero. He sighed- the foot steps were gone and anyway, it's not like anyone would listen to him. There was no one left to care about his late night endeavours.

He started to head back down to the dungeons; all that running had him pretty exhausted. 

"Salazar."

The portrait didn't budge.

_"Salazar."_

Draco groaned. He couldn't fucking believe this. Those two must've swapped the password on the notification board. Again. He threaded his fingers through his platinum locks and yanked, willing the tears to stop. It was so unfair. He just wanted it to stop; he wanted to sleep and never wake up because all he had to wake up to was this. Then again, his sleep was plagued too. Draco sobbed. It was completely and utterly unfair that all he wanted right now, was to curl up in Harry's warm embraced and kiss his perfect mouth forever. Draco's heart ached.

* * *

"Draco Malfoy."

Said boy groaned in his sleep, turning over and hitting something cold. He shifted uncomfortably. 

"Malfoy," He was shaken gently, "Get up."

Roused from his sleep, Draco rubbed his eyes, gaped and rubbed them again. Clearly his mind had found new ways to taunt him; conjuring up Harry Potter in his room. He smiled contently and groped around for his dressing gown. Ah yes- that's right. He _couldn't_ go back to his dorm last night on account of him having the most pleasant house mates that ever did wave a wand. 

"Malfoy; care to tell me why you're sleeping in the middle of the hallway?"

"If you're willing to tell me what you're doing sneaking around Hogwarts at dawn, Potter?"

Harry pursed his lips and walked off. Draco, after a moment, scrambled up and stumbled after him.

"Where are you running off to?" He asked, matching Harry's stride. Harry ignored him and continued up towards the seventh floor, past a very familiar portrait. 

"What..." 

Draco followed Harry into the room. This time, it was a quaint little sitting room. Harry plopped ungracefully down onto one of the floral armchairs. Draco perched on the edge of the red plush lounge and took in the cream wallpaper and wooden floors that were somehow so Potter-like, that Draco couldn't help but smile. He turned his head towards Harry when the boy cleared his throat. 

"Well? We're alone now."

Draco's heart stopped and he stammered for words. If Harry planned on- he breathed feverishly- taking him. Ideally, he'd like a proper courtship first, but...he'd just have to take what he could get!

Harry, clearly misinterpreting his reaction for apprehension, exclaimed, "Oh sod off. I'm not going to hex you Malfoy- I'd like to think we're past that?" Harry raised an eyebrow and Draco nodded sheepishly; embarrassed by the direction his thoughts had gone. Definitely not _those_ kind of wand fights.

"I know we haven't exactly been chummy with one another," Draco snorted at that, "But considering everything that's happened, I think we should start over. Wipe the slate clean- you know?"

Draco stared, bewildered. Harry held out his hand, "Truce?"

Draco looked from Harry, to the outstretched hand and back to Harry again, taking Harry's hand in his. Despite the tingles sent down to the base of his spine, Draco managed a nice firm handshake. Harry gave him a devilishly gorgeous lopsided grin; Draco swooned. So much for that. 

"So. Why weren't you in your dorm Draco?"

' _Draco...'_ , Merlin that sounded positively sinful. He gulped, tightening his jaw, "Don't pry into my business. I'm not asking why you were out, so how about we leave it?"

He refused to tell Harry that he was locked out of his own common room; that was way too pitiful. Plus Harry's hero complex would get in the way and there'd be a big confrontation which would just make things worse. 

"Alright then," Came Harry's response, and he launched into a story about the shoddy new seeker on the Bulgarian Quidditch team. Draco found that if they avoided personal topics, conversing with Harry was very enjoyable. He was funny and witty, and you could tell when he was talking about something he was passionate about by the way his eyes lit up, and...Merlin's beard! He sounded like a lovesick schoolgirl. Draco really had to stop doing that, the getting lost in Harry Potter thing. It was a fruitless obsession that would just continue to hurt him; he couldn't stay away. 

"Well, we'd better get to class," Harry said, standing up. Draco rose with him, "Yeah."

The atmosphere had suddenly turned awkward. It was one thing to be open and friendly like this behind closed doors, but opening those doors was quite confronting. 

Draco cursed under his breath as he realised he'd have to get his things from his dorm somehow. He'd just have to get the password from Snape. 

"Harry Potter," Came a shout from down the hallway, "I've been looking for you all morning!"

Both boys looked up and Harry's face broke into a grin at the sight of a pretty young girl with bright red locks jogging towards him, "Sorry Ginny, just been talking with Draco here."

Harry plopped a kiss on her lips and Ginny smiled adoringly up at him, "Oh? Draco, is it?"

"Yep," Harry wrapped an arm around her waist protectively, "We've turned over a new leaf and called a truce you see."

Ginny raised an eyebrow disbelievingly, "Really?" 

Harry nodded in response and gave her a look that said, 'please go along with this.'

After some intense staring, Ginny seemed to finally relent, "I guess that's a good idea," She smiled at Draco, but it seemed a bit forced, "Draco," She said in regard. Draco, however, felt sick to the stomach. It was as if someone had plunged a knife through his chest and twisted it. The feeling of an eternity of pointlessness washed over him and his breathing became laboured.

"Excuse me- I'm very sorry but-," He turned abruptly and rasped, "You'll have, have to excuse me."

Draco ran as fast and as far away as he could. 

* * *

Draco cried himself to sleep most nights, and he never seemed to run out of tears. He'd never felt he could cry in front of anyone else- or at all really. His father had always said it was a sign of weakness and his mother never seemed to really pay enough attention to him to notice. So he'd (almost) always held them in. The tears would spill for his father, for the family he wished he had, for how things are, for how they used to be, and for the aching hole in his heart begging to be filled with green eyes and black hair. Then, after a while, Draco would be tired enough to crash. It was quite pathetic really.

Tonight, for some reason, they wouldn't stop. Probably something to do with Hogwarts and his recently close proximity to Harry. He couldn't just hide away and wallow in self pity- which is what he'd been doing since the end of the war- Draco had been force to face the Wizarding World again. A world that hated him, his kind and everything they'd stood for; no amount of apologies would erase his past.

Harry seemed to think Draco worth redemption. It really tore Draco apart; the hope Harry made him feel. It made it harder to get over the fact that nothing would come of Draco's pining. Draco sobbed and rubbed the wet splotches off his face. Harry wanted to give Draco a second chance at friendship. Draco wanted so much more. Draco wanted desperately and incessantly. He felt his body grow hot at the thought of Harry Potter- his heart beat erratically. Draco fantasied about Harry's lips; he loved how they always managed to carry a smile. Draco imagined they were his- peppering kisses all over his stomach. His fingers stroked up and down his torso. _Harry left wet kissed on his neck and collarbones too. Draco gasped as the other boy's mouth moved gently along his cheekbones. Draco had broke into a sweat; Harry's lips traveled lower, 'Such a good boy, Draco, getting so worked up just for me.' Harry's beautiful mouth wrapped around...around his..._

Draco groaned, slipped his hand into his pants and rutted against it, but he still wasn't satisfied. His clothes were too tight- Harry needed to touch him everywhere. He pulled himself off to images of his cock stuffed into Harry's mouth, hitting the back of his throat. _Harry cupped his sack and licked his head. Draco was slowly losing himself._

"Harry," Draco called breathlessly, "Touch, m-more...oh!"

_Harry smiled around his dick and Draco almost came then and there, 'Anything for you my darling Draco.' Draco whimpered but Harry just grinned and licked a line down the underside of his dick. Draco arched up into Harry's touch as his fingers pushed underneath his balls and caressed the skin there. Harry's victim opened his mouth in a silent scream at the feel of rough fingers probing his hole, 'I love you so much Draco,' Hot tears poured down his face despite his lovers words. Harry kissed his forehead affectionately, 'So, so much.'_

Draco's semen spilled all over his stomach but he was bawling, despite the euphoric feeling of climaxing. 

* * *

Draco woke up feeling uncomfortably sticky and felt his face grow hot as he remembered the reason. Refusing to dwell on it, he quickly showered and changed into his school robes. He was currently looking for his potions essay- the search was quickly becoming futile, however. 

"Hurrah!" He produced the slightly tattered piece of parchment from the top of his canopy; he strangely had no recollection of putting it there. Draco unrolled it so he could smooth it out and his breath caught in his throat.

_Enemies of the Heir, Beware._

Draco's throat went dry- it was written in red. On closer examination it turned out to be merely red ink, but still, one of them was clearly trying to prove a point. He refused to react to them. If he went and told anyone they'd just taunt him more. The boy clenched his fist in frustration, they'd ruined his homework and now he had nothing to hand in; Snape would be so furious. Draco groaned, he'd have to go out there now, and possibly see them.

He opened the door bravely; they'll be too busy to bother him.

"Draco Malfoy," Crooned a shrill voice.

Guess not.

Draco tilted his chin up and looked over their heads, walking determinedly to the portrait. Someone yanked his head around. Pansy.

"Don't ignore me you blood traitor."

For the millionth time, he regretted every spiteful word he'd ever said to anyone. Being on the receiving end really changed Draco's outlook. He knew it took a lot of work to be that hateful, but it had been his safety net in a way. If people feared, or even hated, him they'd not go near him or try to get close. When people got close to your heart they become a weakness, and weaknesses would break you. Weaknesses kill you. Draco didn't want a weakness, it was dangerous to carry such a thing around. Henceforth, it'd almost gotten him killed in his allegiance to Voldemort. He shuddered.

"Did you like my note Draco?" Pansy smirked evilly.

Draco smiled sarcastically,"It was touching."

Pansy glared and stalked off. Draco dusted off his robes and headed to breakfast quite contentedly, 'That was surprisingly unproblematic,' He thought blissfully.

* * *

Harry was just ten centimetres away from him- it was driving him mad. They were close enough so that Draco could hear him occasionally force air out from his nose, Harry would do this whenever he was stuck. It was very endearing, but then again, almost everything about him was. Draco smiled ruefully, Merlin, he was such a desperate sap. 

An elbow to his ribs pulled him out of his reverie, Harry gestured to their potions teacher, "Mr Malfoy," Snape snapped,"Your essay, if you please."

Merlin's balls he was screwed, "Well you see Professor-" He began.

"Don't worry Draco," Pansy waved a familiar roll of parchment in the air triumphantly, "You forgot this on your way out, so I took the liberty of bringing it for you."

Draco gritted his teeth, "How thoughtful," He seethed. Pansy just beamed at him, Draco grimaced as Snape snatched it out of her hand. His eyes scanned it briefly, "Mr Malfoy you will see me after class."

Draco swallowed, this wasn't going to end well.

* * *

Snape held up the offending paper, "What," He droned, "Is this exactly?"

"It's not what you think Professor!"

"The war is over Draco; you don't strike me as a petty person."

"I know and I'm not," He protested, "It was Pansy- why else would she be so happy about helping me? Everyone hates me anyway-" 

Shit. He'd given it away.

"Draco-" His Godfather started.

He stood up quickly, "No. No. No. We're not turning this into a meeting about the piteous Draco Malfoy."

Snape open his mouth to intervene, but Draco pressed on, "I don't want some kind of intervention, I'm handling this perfectly on my own."

 _'Plus, I pretty much deserve every second of it,'_ He added sourly. 

The potions master sighed and gave his godson a fond look, "I swore to your mother that'd I'd look after you and that I will."

"I'm a big boy now," Draco said more softly, "I can handle myself."

A silent agreement passed between them; their observation of one another was interrupted by a knock on the door. Snape straightened up, returning to his infamous monotone expression, "Ah yes, that'll be your new student."

Draco's head snapped back in Snape's direction, "Excuse me?"

The older man rolled his eyes as if it were obvious, "You're my best student, and he really does need the help," He said the last part with disdain. 

"What?"

Draco was frantic, this was an absolute disaster. He almost jumped out of his skin when another knock echoed through room. 

"Come in, Mr Potter." 

* * *

Whilst waiting for his student, Draco had resorted to either biting his nails or repeatedly reading passages from 'Advanced Potion Making'. He was so nervous about being alone with Harry. Sure they'd had that chat last week, but that was spontaneous and didn't leave Draco to fret and worry about every possible outcome; even one where Harry sweeps him off his feet and takes them both on a romantic broomstick ride into the sunset. 

Draco rested his chin in his hands and proceeded to day dream about romantic dates with the Saviour of the World. 

_Thud!_

"Hey Draco, sorry I'm a little late," Draco scrambled to regain his composure and fight the blood traveling to his face- it's not like Harry could read his thoughts. Well, he could try, but Draco was well versed will Occlumency thanks to...unfavourable circumstances. 

_"Circumstances? Don't try to dodge the blame Draco, you chose to follow Him,"_ hissed a cold, paternal voice. Draco clenched his fists.

"Don't worry about it Potter-I mean-Harry," Draco corrected himself, loving the feel of Harry's name rolling off his tongue. He wanted to say it over and over- to shout it from the top of the school. However, he squashed down his giddiness and turned his attention to the task at hand. Harry had seated himself on a seat next to him (so deliciously close- Draco could barely breath), with a roll of parchment, self-inking quill and an expectant look for his tutor. Harry cleared his throat and Draco realised he was staring. 

"Er...right! Um," he flipped through his textbook, "Draught of Living Death!"

"We've done that Draco," Harry smirked.

"Shut up- I knew that. We're doing some revision of N.E.W.T potions!" he countered excitedly. 

Harry's smile changed, and it made Draco a little dizzy, "You really do love Potions, don't you?"

Draco stared, bemused, "Y-yeah I guess; it's nice to um...be able to create something. I can just grab some ingredients and make something useful and it kind of feels like compensation for, um, yeah...," he blinked back images of darkness, bright green light and so many bodies. So much blood.

_"On your hands boy."_

"Anyway," he pushed on, refusing to look at Harry, "What is the draught used for?"

Harry had a hand on his shoulder and Draco could almost feel his pity,"Draco, are you all right? Do you-"

"What is the use Harry? If you don't have an answer we'll have to move on," he said meaningfully. 

Harry's hand slipped away and Draco felt cold, "It sends the drinker into a deathlike sleep," Harry answered dejectedly. 

"Very good." he snapped, then almost slapped himself. If he wasn't careful he would ruin this relationship. Draco couldn't risk that- it was all he had with Harry. Peeking at his new friend in his peripheral vision, he saw a glum, idle face. Draco cursed his defensiveness- Harry was only trying to be nice and he'd gone and spat it in his face. Merlin, it was no wonder he'd never had and real friends! Frantically searching for a solution, he grinned at the next item on his list.

"Ah, Polyjuice Potion; you wouldn't know anything about that, would you Harry?" Draco smiled wryly.

"Of course not," the other boy deadpanned. The tension proved too much and the boys erupted in a fit of laughter. Draco was mesmerised by how carefree Harry's laughter was. The boy caught him staring, much to Draco's horror, but Harry only smiled back. It was gentle and, dare he hope, affectionate. He shook his head, coming back to his senses. Pfft- affection? For him? Yeah right. Draco grew uncomfortable and shifted away, the fact that he subconsciously moved closer to Harry dawning on him. 

"You snort when you laugh," Harry remarked, in the sad tone of longing he himself used. Draco wasn't able to decipher what that meant due to a blood-curdling shriek. Harry was out the door in seconds- bloody hero instincts. Draco tried to ignore the nagging feeling and read through his notes, but surrendered with a groaned. 'Bloody Harry Potter,' he thought as he sprinted after him. 

Draco found him circling a monstrous snake, surprisingly not alone. Longbottom was bleeding on the floor, lying motionless. 

"What the hell is going on Harry?" He screeched urgently.

Harry looked up and grinned, "Well-" The ghastly reptile took this time to strike. It sunk it's fangs into Harry's shoulder and he cried out in pain. Draco was frantic as he watched Harry simultaneously try to grab his wand and push the beast off of him.He's going die. He's going to die! Draco was rooted to the spot and his heart felt icy. He willed himself to take action, but he was paralysed from utter terror.

_"You're too much of coward to even save the one you love the most?"_

His father had a point, and for once, it was vaguely helpful. It riled Draco up enough to dash foreword and draw his wand with a reckless adrenaline, "Deletrius!"

The scaly, writhing creature disintegrated in a cloud of black smoke. Draco rushed to Harry's side, "Oh Merlin Harry are you alright?"

Harry looked sickly pale and Draco was trying not to burst into tears- he needed to help Harry. He gingerly pulled down the collar of his newly reddened shirt, "Oh shit, oh shit, shit, shit."

There were two puncture marks that were oozing blood all over Harry's shoulder, the skin around it was bruised purple and blue, and black veins grew out like branches. Draco bit his lip. The boy in his arms winced- thank Merlin he was alive, "Harry?" he called hopefully, "Harry please be alright."

He only groaned in response, Draco buried his face in Harry's mop of dark hair and breathed deeply, trying to calm himself, 'Okay,' he thought, taking another shaky breath of Harry, 'Okay, he just needed to take him to Madame Pomfrey and she would make him better. There was also the matter of Longbottom...Harry would want him to help.' 

Draco sighed, "What are you doing to me?" he asked an unconscious Harry. He pointed his wand at Longbottom's unconscious body.

"Wingardium Leviosa."

Draco gingerly lifted Harry in his arms, his face was yellow and he was moaning in pain, Draco was on verge of breaking down. He didn't know what he'd do if Harry wasn't around. He was the reason Draco had come back to school, hoping for Harry's forgiveness and for some place in the hero's life; even if he could just have a small place in his heart, a tiny space that no one used- like a broom cupboard- his own heart would burst. 

* * *

As soon as he'd entered the infirmary, Madame Pomfrey had taken both the injured and shooed Draco off. He'd been pacing outside ever since and it was all he could do not to hyperventilate, cry, throw up or all three. Harry Potter was going to die. 

_"It'll be all your fault, because you failed to react quick enough."_

"Shut up."

_"But you know that it's true Draco."_

"Stop it," Draco pleaded.

_"You know that Harry could never love a sniveling little boy like you, no matter what you do for him. You're too weak."_

By now Draco was in fetal position, covering his ears, but it never made the voices go away, they were part of him. Inside his head where he couldn't hide.

"Stop it. Stop it please," he whispered over and over. 

That's how Madame Pomfrey found him, curled up on the floor and talking to himself. She got him inside and avoided her inquiries about himself and instead, relayed to her the happenings of a few hours ago when Harry was attacked by a snake. 

"But will he live? Is he all right?" Draco looked at her with wide, urgent eyes. Pomfrey gave a sympathetic smile, "Of course dear, do you have no faith in my abilities? _Both_ boys are stable and just need some rest and medicine."

Draco blushed and mumbled, "Er yes, I wish Longbottom a steady recovery as well." 

The old witch just looked at him with a knowing twinkle in her eye, "Well, I'll be off to bed dear, and you should be off too!" She gave him a wink and an allusive smile and Draco was left stammering- what was she on about? He ignored it and hurried to Harry's bedside. After hovering awkwardly for a while, he decided to pull up a chair (it's not like Harry could see him anyway). With that thought, he laced their fingers together and smiled to himself, absentmindedly stroking Harry's knuckles. 

"You really scared the shit out of me, you know Harry? Don't do that again!"

Draco smiled fondly and ran his fingers through untidy tresses, "And you really should brush your hair- it's simply atrocious," he scolded.

"Lucky you don't have long hair like- like my father," he finished lamely. Could he? Draco sucked on his top lip and studied the sleeping boy. He was asleep, he couldn't hear anything and Draco really needed to get this out. He gripped Harry's hand tighter, anchoring himself. 

"I know that your uncle put you under the stairs, starved you and made you a slave. I know that some father's beat their son's, abuse them or just leave them. And compared to that, it probably isn't that bad but," he took a deep breath, "I just want to tell you and I'm not brave enough to do it while you're awake because you'll think I'm weak and crazy."

Harry's face was relaxed and open, obviously because he was sleeping, but Draco felt like he was encouraging him, "My father was just...not there. That's not what I mean, uh, it was more like he was indifferent to me. Yeah, because I remember when I was younger I always did everything I could to make him proud- like any child- but he never seen do care. 'Father I topped my class! Father I look how fast I can fly! Father I got Outstanding on my Potions essay!' He never acknowledged me- when I did something right that is. Father was always there to point out what I couldn't do, what my weaknesses were," Draco brought Harry's hand to his cheek and rubbed it, quite forgetting where he was,"So I thought that if I joined Voldemort and fought for his cause, he'd finally take notice of something I did," he laughed bitterly, "You can guess how that turned out!"

Draco stared longingly, maybe if things had gone differently, Harry could share something about his upbringing and they could have a right old groan about crappy childhoods. He grinned, that made them sound like sour, old men. 

"A-and now I hear him everywhere," Draco ventured, "Like he's infiltrated by conscious and his voice is just always in my ear. Especially when I'm feeling down..." Draco smiled lovingly, "You always make me happy though."

Harry's hand had been stroking his cheek the whole time, now Draco brought them to trail over his lips. He pressed kisses all over Harry's hand and brushed his mouth across his wrist. Draco yawned and fell asleep contentedly, gripping Harry's hand. He didn't dream that night.

* * *

A beautiful warmth simmered inside Draco's chest and he woke gently, granted, his back felt like it'd been ran over by a heard of centaurs. He froze at the foreign sound of soft, irregular snores. Blood. The snake. Harry...

The object of his infatuation roused from his sleep, more like he half regained consciousness- he didn't seem to know what was going on, "Mmm Draco?" Harry stretched out, displaying one very attractive abdomen.

"Y-yes?" Draco said fearfully. What if Harry was disgusted by his obvious attachment? Worse- what if he heard Draco's confessions?

Harry beckoned him closer with one hand and Draco obliged cautiously. The hand rested on the back of his neck, stroking it reverently and he was uncommonly soothed. 

"Harry," he gasped, "what are you doing?" 

Draco was struggling to keep his eyes open (and he for one wasn't half asleep), his breath coming out in short puffs. Harry ignored his questions and continued fawning him. The caresses moved upwards, to his cheek, and Draco leaned into in and practically purred. Harry's eyes were lidded, with lust, Draco imagined.

"Draco."

It was so low and heavy with emotion that Draco's heart clenched painfully; to have someone say his name like that. The feeling of being needed made Draco's eyes prick with tears. 'He's not even fully aware yet,' his mind reasoned. Then reason crashed and burned. Harry had one hand gripping his shoulder and was kissing him ferociously. He thought he broke down for a moment, then that he was dreaming, but his weren't that pleasant. So the velvety, wet mouth enclosing his was real? A moment of insecurity followed, 'Could Harry really want him?' The hot tongue fondling his lips erased his doubts and filled his mind with giddy fulfillment.

Draco leapt onto Harry's lap, slipped his tongue between his lips and stroked the other's hungrily. He knelt up and pulled at black locks to tilt Harry's head. Harry gasped and Draco tried to swallow it but was pushed onto his back. 'This was getting a little heated,' he thought excitedly, 'Hope Madame Pomfrey doesn't walk in.'

"What the fuck Malfoy?" Harry demanded, clearly awake and clearly unaware who had initiated the snogging. 'Fuck me; can't get a moments pleasure!' he lamented.

"Well? Are you going to explain yourself?" 

"You started it Harry," he started as calmly as he could, "So I don't know why you're blaming me."

"You're lying! Why would I want to kiss you?"

That was like a blow to the chest, and Draco was finding it hard to breath, "What? B-but we- you-" he spluttered, feeling small. This wasn't happening. To dangle his greatest desire in from of him and let him have a glimpse of utopia. Only to tear it apart in front of his eyes...that was too much. Draco whimpered despairingly.

Harry seemed exasperated, but he refused to look at him, "I have a girlfriend Draco. I'd never feel anything for you."

"Ha-arry," blubbered Draco. His world had come crashing down, and it was the cruelest of falls. He'd been brought up so high by Harry's attention- his touch, his kiss- only to have his anchorage ripped away. It felt like drowning, and he might as well be. Draco turned on his heel and ran, outside. The walls of the castle felt suffocating and he needed fresh air. Choking, he stumbled through the grounds to the edge of the Forbidden Forest. He clawed at his throat because he couldn't breathe but he honestly didn't know if he wanted to anymore. A shattered scream tore from his lungs and liquid poured from his eyes. 

_"You know that Harry could never love a sniveling little boy like you, no matter what you do for him. You're too weak."_

The mess of a boy dry heaved against a tree. Draco leaned back on it and slid down, his legs too weak to support himself. His mouth was sour, his body was broken and he had a heart with nothing to beat for. 

_"You're too weak."_

_"Weak, weak, weak."_

Draco rose robotically, latching to this mantra. He was so stupid; yet again his weaknesses had been his downfall. Love was a weakness and he wouldn't- didn't- feel it any longer. Draco wouldn't feel any longer. 

_"You will not be weak,"_ he commanded.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just in case you haven't re-read the first chapter (old readers) then I suggest you do as it was heavily updated on the 13th of June! If you've read it since then, then enjoy this final installment!  
> -Veda Aquila

Harry pressed his hands to his temples in frustration, 'That was a complete disaster.'

He recalled Draco's absolutely shattered expression and a new wave of guilt washed over him; he clearly sent the wrong messages. Harry wasn't interested in Draco. _'Draco.'_ Fervent kisses, sultry gasps and desperate touches; Harry remembered the blond with an intensity he'd never felt before. 

"Damn it," he shook his head clear and chanted, "Ginny. Ginny. Ginny." Harry pictured her strawberry locks, her flowery smell and the enticing curves of her hips and breasts. His heart rate slowed to a resting point and Harry slammed his face into his pillow with a groan. What was going on? 

Madame Pomfrey's entrance was a welcomed distraction, "Ah, Mr Potter! I see you're awake- how are you feeling?"

'Kinda shitty and overwhelmingly confused,' but Harry smiled and gave a convincing okay.

"Well I'll just be doing a final check up then, and seeing as you were passed out, I would like a full account of what exactly caused your late night visit."

The boy glanced at his bandaged shoulder with unease but begun, "Well I was at the library getting tutored by Draco, when I heard someone screaming. I was out the door in a flash- and Draco must have followed soon after." 

He took a deep breath, it'd really rattled him to see his friend in such a state, after he'd lost so much already. It was a cold reminder that just because Voldemort was gone, death and loss would prevail.

"Neville was lying in a mess of his own blood a-and I thought," he choked and whispered, "he was dead."

The medi-witch put a reassuring hand on his good shoulder, "I shouldn't have asked you so soon afterwards, if you want you can come back later dear. Merlin knows you deserve a rest." 

Harry shook his head, Neville was okay and he just wanted to get this over with, "Anyway; he looked bad. So I ran up to him and then I heard this, uh, hissing and it was this great big snake. I got out my wand and that's when Draco came and it just lunged at me- it was too heavy to move- and it's fangs jabbed into my shoulder, like needles. All I remember was Draco shouting and my shoulder bleeding and throbbing, then darkness."

"Then Mr Malfoy disintegrated the snake and brought you both here." _'Draco,'_ He felt his heart jump at the name; Harry steadfastly ignored it, "How's Neville?" he asked sheepishly, feeling bad for neglecting his friend. 

Pomfrey lead him to a bed with a white faced Neville covered in bandages, "Both Mr Longbottom and yourself arrived in a state of unconsciousness, filled with venom. The toxins have been removed, but as Mr Longbottom had them in his system for a much longer time, as well as having some magically induced wounds previously inflicted, he has yet to wake up from his comatose state," she announced grimly. 

Harry blinked once, twice, completely baffled by the scenario, "But why?" 

In the heat of the moment, he'd never questioned why his friend was bitten by a snake. Pomfrey had also mentioned _'magically induced wounds',_ meaning Neville was attacked. A surge of anger clouded his thoughts, 'Why did people have to keep fighting? Why does there always have to be pain? Why can't the world just leave him alone?'

A matronly voice brought him back down to earth, "We will have to get the rest of the story out of Mr Longbottom when he wakes up. In the meantime, seeing as you're all better, you should be heading back to your dorm Mr Potter."

"Yeah I guess so. Thanks Madame Pomfrey," he gave her a grateful smile and walked out. 

Harry released a deep breath and let the doors to the infirmary hold him up. How had everything gone to shit so fast? Just a few weeks ago all he'd had to worry about was studying for his N.E.W.Ts, becoming an Auror and spending time with Ginny and his friends. Now? Neville had just escaped death's clutches and was currently in a coma and there was clearly some dark magic going on. That morning he'd found Draco Harry had been spying on a group of students in the restricted section. Then someone had come in and he'd had to hide; they'd also scared off the group of fiends. After the intruder had left, Harry saw the piles of hastily left books, and they were all on dark spells and curses. Harry shuddered at the thought. Do wars ever really end?

There was also the worry of maybe (probably not though) falling out of love, and, as always, Draco Malfoy. The two really couldn't stay away from each other, granted, not typically in this way. Harry cursed himself, 'What did that mean? He wasn't treating Draco any specific way.'

For the week they'd been 'friends'- it felt different to his other friendships somehow- things had been going quite nicely. Harry was worried there'd be lingering rivalry, but found Draco as willing as himself to put the past behind them. He found himself enjoying the other boy's blunt, sarcastic personality; he'd always hated the people who glorified him, and even more so the fakes who just want a taste of fame. Harry grinned fondly, Draco's honesty was refreshing and soon he was relishing their regular tutoring sessions in the library. 

That was when the problem started. Harry would visibly brighten whenever Draco gave him his attention and his thoughts would randomly shift to an angled face with platinum hair and steel eyes. Whenever Draco was near his heart fluttered and his skin grew warmed and inched to be caressed. Ron was too dense to notice stubble reactions like that, but he was certain that Hermione and, much to his horror, Ginny had picked up on it. Although they'd mercifully avoided confrontation; so far. Honestly, Harry had no idea what he'd say to the girls- least of all Ginny- he was quite baffled considering his previous relationship with Draco. 

Lost in thought, Harry jumped at the unusual sound of footsteps. It was Tuesday and everyone _should_ be well into second period by now. Old habits bid him draw his wand and he tensed himself, then relaxed, it was Draco. His palms were clammy as he stowed his wand and his heart sank- Draco's red eyes and blotchy face revealed he'd been crying. It was all Harry's fault, he really did overreact. He went over to apologise, "Draco?" he called cautiously. The boy in question turned and Harry was shocked still for a moment; no longer did his silver eyes sparkle with suppressed affection (a fact Harry had admittedly just noticed), they were glassy and disturbingly blank. His face was cold and his stance was stiff; Draco didn't shift closer to Harry, reflectively lean into him or take any excuse to touch him. The blonde had completely closed himself off and it hurt Harry more than he'd expected. 

"Um I just wanted you to know, that...er..." he really couldn't do this- what if Draco just brushes him off? He'd surely have it coming. Puffing out his chest to evoke confidence, he continued, "I'm very sorry for what I said before and how I reacted. It was...over the top and I hope you can forgive me?" 

Harry gave his most hopeful smile, discouragingly, Draco didn't visibly budge, but answered, "That's perfectly alright Potter," Harry's face fell- the other boy sounded rehearsed and distant, "it's not your fault and it won't happen again."

"N-no it was my fault you see! I kissed you first and then I freaked- I was way too harsh and I should've let you explain. You don't have to, er, forget it so quickly, I mean, I wouldn't mind if we-um- not saying I _want_ to...but, yeah," he trailed off, getting caught up in the urgent, passionate feelings of that fleeted kiss. Heart stuttering, Harry looked to Draco for a response, an emotion- anything really- but all he got were tight lips and dull eyes. 

"I think it would be best if we kept a professional relationship strictly during classes and thrice-weekly tutoring," apparently Draco had left his final words and had dropped the conversation. Harry tried desperately to hang on, "Wait Draco! I'm sorry; you don't have to go," the slim, pointy figure kept walking further and further out of Harry's grasp, "Stop! Stop it please!"

Strangely enough, Draco finally faltered mid-step and Harry stumbled toward him, "Draco, please."

Harry grabbed his shoulder and turned Draco to face him. The boy still remained expressionless, but Harry was sure there had to be something, "Please listened to me. I still want to see you, and I'm definitely confused right now, but I know that I need _us,"_ he said sincerely. He knew he was going to be embarrassed by that confession, but he needed to get through to Draco.

When there remained no reaction, Harry did the last thing he could think of and press their mouths together. He tilted his head and engulfed his mouth over Draco's, sliding his tongue around cold, unresponsive lips. Heat, pressure and desire clouded his mind and he purred with content. He yanked Draco closer- never close enough- and ran his hands through fine hair, over soft skin and lean arms, finally resting on his shoulders with a whimper. Nothing- absolutely nothing. Harry pulled away to scan Draco's eyes minutely; seeing a flashes of conflict and wanting so ancient and powerful that it made his knees almost give way, but it was gone as soon as it came- leaving emptiness. 

With no fight left, Harry's arms fell limp and Draco turned, walking calmly out and never looking back. 

Harry stood stock- still in the hallway until the first students started filling up it, then he ran up to Gryffindor Tower, staying in his dorm until his housemates came up after classes. 

* * *

"Harry mate! You gave us all a bloody good scare when you didn't come back last night!"

"Luckily _I_ thought to visit the infirmary before breakfast, but Madame Pomfrey said you were not to be disturbed."

"You didn't turn up for lunch either, but are you 'right now?"

"Here's the homework, and the notes you missed," a pile of parchment was put in front of his face. Harry looked up at his friends expectant and worried faces and decided he'd stop moping about.

He gave the best smile he could given his current mood, "Sorry guys- didn't mean to worry you. It was just a little scratch but I was passed out so I woke up just before lunch and went straight here."

Hermione looked exasperated as she fussed over him, "Well that means you haven't eaten a thing all day! And clearly it wasn't 'just a scratch' otherwise you wouldn't have a bandage!"

Harry covered his shoulder sheepishly and Ron- blinking at it in amazement- appeared to have just noticed it. Then, remembering something important, his best friend looked around the dorms, "Did Neville come back with you?" 

With a sigh, Harry relented his tale of the previous night; leaving out the happenings of the morning. 

"Bloody Hell."

Hermione pulled him into a suffocating hug, "Oh Harry, no wonder you look so out of sorts! What with last year..." She gave him an empathetic look. Ron put a hand on his shoulder (it was probably supposed to be comforting) and Harry yelped in pain, "Ron that's my bad shoulder you idiot."

"Oh shit! Sorry mate, I didn't mean-" he stopped at Harry's mischievous grin and punched him (in the good shoulder), "You're a complete arsehole!"

The three friends laughed and joked- just like old times, and Harry forgot about the slender boy with platinum hair and steel grey eyes; only momentarily of course. 

"Well Harry, we'll leave you to rest," Hermione said, getting up and pulling her boyfriend with her, "Ron and I will check on Neville then grab you something to eat, okay? Besides, I know Ginny is eager to see you," she winked uncharacteristically before walking out.

Ron suppressed a grimace, the whole 'my sister and best friend are dating' thing was still a bit new, and the idea of the two doing anything like _that_ was just probably never not going to gross the red head out, "'Mione!"

Hermione rolled her eyes and grinned at Harry, that's when he remembered that he's supposed to be dating- and in love- with Ginny, and he gave his best embarrassed smile, but gauging from his friend's reaction, it probably looked a little depressed. 

Just as she is about to comment, Ginny comes bursting into the room looking quite flustered, "What are you guys still doing here?" she whisper- shouts at Ron and Hermione, saving himself from an interrogation. The two leave- Ron more hurriedly than necessary- and Ginny flings herself at Harry, peppering kisses all over his face.

"I missed you so much! I was so worried, I thought you'd gone and died for real!"

Harry didn't feel his heart race at her touch, nor the sensation of fire burning through his nerves, like he normally did. Instead, he felt a little uncomfortable, so he pushed her off without thinking. Ginny stepped back- confused and hurt- and Harry cursed his impulsiveness. 

"Sorry Gin- just my shoulder's a little sore," he said, scrambling for words, "you've just got to be gentle with me, " he gave her a cheeky smile and she laughed. No matter what his feelings were for her, Ginny was still one of his closest friends and he hated to see her hurt.

She tentatively put a hand on his jaw and brought her lips up to his. It was certainly enjoyable, but he'd had a taste of what kissing could be like, and Harry knew he couldn't go back. Despite that, he made sure to respond with as much keenness as was warranted of a teenage boyfriend. Harry couldn't help but notice the sloppiness of Ginny's tongue and the harshness of her touch. 

Leading him to the bed, she lowered them down and positioned her body in between his legs. Ginny panted as she kissed him and seemed overly eager in her caress of his body. Harry gasped as she stroked his thigh, climbing scandalously higher.

"Ginny! Ron and Hermione- or one of my roommates- could walk in any second; and I don't fancy them seeing my dick!"

Persistent she remained, stroking his crotch in order to arouse him and resting her body fully on his. It felt foreign Harry put his arm up and gave her a gentle shove, "Gin- my shoulder remember? Maybe we could just, er, cuddle?" 

Ginny seemed a little disappointed, but clearly desperate to please, she latched onto his arm and pushed herself as close to him as possible.

"How 'bout you take a rest? It'll make you feel better," she cooed, stroking his hair in a way that always made him sleepy.

"Good idea," he lied down and was asleep within minutes; Ginny at his side. 

* * *

Harry woke with a start, having had a pretty dark dream, he was sweating a little. In the dream, he'd been walking through complete darkness, and all he could remember was that he was looking for something- someone- precious. The disturbance had also awoken Ginny, who wanted to know if everything was alright.

"Yeah, just a bad dream," he furrowed his brow, only noticing for the first time, "What's the time?"

"Uh it's almost 10- why?"

"Don't you think it's a bit strange that Hermione- of all people- is still out this close to curfew?"

"She might have gone back to her dorm Harry, you don't need to worry," she said reassuringly. 

"Ron's not back either, besides, they were only visiting Neville then dropping by the kitchens, and it's been hours," he was getting more stressed out by the minute.

"They could have just both gone back to Hermione's dorm for some alone time," Ginny countered hurriedly.

Harry hesitated, "True, but- Hermione wouldn't let Ron stay so late, or do anything like _that_ in the dorms."

Ginny was stammering, trying to come up with another explanation to her friends whereabouts, Harry thought she was just as anxious as him and tried to calm her, "Hey, how about you go check the girls dorm, and I'll check the kitchen. If you don't find anything, meet me outside the infirmary, okay?"

Not looking him in the eye, she nodded. Harry smiled sadly, kissed her on the forehead and then left, grabbing his wand and cloak.

* * *

Pacing outside the infirmary doors, Harry tried to make sense of it all. The house elves hadn't seen anyone come down, nor had Madame Pomfrey had any visitors! Not to mention Ginny still hadn't shown up, 'Maybe she's found them already,' shaking that thought away (he'd have been told), Harry proceeded to wear out the floor. 

This whole situation was giving him a really bad feeling and Harry was just about ready to enter full-blown panic mode, when he remembered something, 'The Marauder's Map! Harry you imbecile!' 

Harry raced up to his dorm and snatched the map out of his trunk, "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good."

The map came to life and his eyes were instantly drawn to the names of his two friends...in The Shrieking Shack? With Ginny?! Harry bit his lip, 'Maybe they were all captured- but their captor would surely be there! Unless it was a trap,' he was just overthinking it. They're probably planning something- although it wasn't his birthday for a while yet. Nevertheless, Harry pulled the invisibility cloak tighter around himself and moved out to the Womping Willow as fast as he could, without revealing his feet.

Making sure to tap the right branch, Harry slid inside, flung off his cloak and pulled out his wand. He was a little riled up and in a stiff fighting stance, scanning the room for his friends. 

"Oh Ron- it's Harry! Harry! Over here," a voice shrieked; distinctly Hermione's. Harry looked up towards the sound and saw light pouring through an open door. He charged up the stairs and found Ron and Hermione bound in an _Incarcerous._

"What happened?" 

He stepped in cautiously,"And where's Ginny?" 

"Here Harry," he heard Ron scoff, but not anything more because of the gag around his mouth. 

"Ginny? Wha-?" 

Her wand was raised offensively, but Ginny's voice shook as she spoke,"You can't blame me Harry- for being jealous. You've barely spent any time with me and you don't seem interested in me anymore...so I'm being perfectly reasonable," she was on the verge of tears and seemed to be more concerned with convincing herself. 

"I've got no idea what you're talking about Ginny," Harry approached her slowly, "You can't be jealous of Ron and Hermione! They're my friends and I still get to spend time with other people. This isn't the way to go about this; you should've just talked to me."

By now she was crying, letting Harry pat her back soothingly, but he clearly wasn't going to get anything more out of her.

'It's not like Ginny to be this possessive, let alone take it out on my friends.'

Harry pointed his wand at the captives, "Finite Incantatem."

Ron rushed to his sister and started shouting at her, also shouting at Harry in intervals.

"Hermione, are you okay?Is what she's saying true? Because that doesn't make any sense and I know she'd never do something like this," Honestly, he was completely baffled by the whole ordeal. Of course he couldn't have just one year of peace at Hogwarts!

She nodded firmly, "Ron and I are both fine...but you should know Ginny didn't do this," Hermione seemed to consider something, "Well, at least she wasn't the one who tied us up."

Harry was shaking his head, "I don't understand."

"We were walking back from the infirmary- Neville is well on the mend by the way- when we ran into Pansy, Blaise and a few other Slytherins I didn't recognise and, well, we woke up here with Ginny pointing a wand at us and telling us not to move."

Harry groaned in exasperation, "That still doesn't make any sense!"

"Mate," Harry turned to look at Ron- who looked very concerned, "They're up to something- those Slytherins- and they've bargained with Ginny to keep us here. Me and Hermione are the bait."

"Bait?"

Ron nodded guiltily, "So you'd come running."

Ginny sniffled, Ron gave her a dirty look, Hermione was restraining herself and Harry still had no idea what was going on (what else was new). 

"Why are you helping them Ginny?"

Ginny shook her head, "I can't tell you because you'll hate me."

Harry felt the Marauder's Map slip from his pocket and Hermione opening it; he sat down next to Ginny, "I'm sure that couldn't happen, you're one of my closest friends."

In a show of amusement, she scoffed, "Yeah, 'friends' Harry. That's just what I want to to hear from my _boyfriend,_ " she muttered the word, like she didn't really believe it herself.

"Ginny," he was feeling guilty now- it was true that he'd been neglecting her these past few weeks, what with his tutoring sessions and spending time with Draco. Harry's eyelashes fluttered against his cheekbones and his chest let out a sigh. A lot of his free time nowadays was spent with Draco; getting to know the real him- the Draco that wasn't controlled by his father. 

Ginny was still talking about when they'd first got together, he grimaced, he really was a shitty boyfriend. Harry glanced at her, she wasn't exactly pretty- but radiant, and Harry really had been drawn to her; once. The thing was, and he'd come to realise it soon enough, she wasn't the brightest thing in his universe anymore. Harry knew he had to tell her, it wasn't fair on Ginny to keep stringing her along when he was no longer in love. 

Taking a deep breath, he started, "Um Ginny-"

"Harry- Harry we've got to go right now," Hermione was tucking away the map and looking at him with urgency, "I found them- they're down at the Lake, and Draco is there too."

Harry looked up with wide, startled eyes and scrambled up quickly, "What?"

She just nodded, "And something tells me he's not there willingly."

"Is this what you're doing? Keeping me away from him? And you'd actually let them do Merlin know's what to him?" 

He was glaring at one very ashamed and beaten Ginny, _"How could you?_ Haven't you noticed how they've bee treating him- Parkinson and Zabini?"

Harry was trying to make eye contact, so she could see how absolutely _livid_ he was, but she wouldn't look up, "You never looked at me anymore- not like I was special, at least- but you were always goggling him," she said bitterly, "I was jealous! Malfoy had been so horrible to you all these years, and it was his fault Dumbledor died, yet you prefer him over me?"

By now they were standing and shouting, not exactly how he planned this conversation to go, "Seriously? The war is over Ginny, and there's no use dwelling on the past. Besides, if he hadn't lied in the Manor, if'd he and his mother had turned me over to Voldemort, I'd very well be dead and you know it!"

Ginny screamed in frustration, "But he's- he's, Malfoy!"

"I know! And I really like him and I don't want to hurt you Ginny, because we've been through so much together, but this can't keep going. I can't keep being here with you when I'm so desperate to be somewhere else."

Ginny was quiet- from anger or contemplation- and Ron took this opportunity to speak up, "Er Harry you know I've never liked Malfoy and, let's face it, we're are just never going to get along but, I don't mind who you're with as long as you're happy and they treat you right mate."

The two best friends grinned at each other, "That means a lot Ron, thanks."

"That's all well and good- I do agree with Ron Harry," she smiled, "-but we really should be going. The trio nodded and ran out- Ginny following sulkily- into the quiet nighttime of Hogsmead. Nothing was open aside from a few pubs- housing the only noise- and unfortunately not Honeydukes. A quick spell and they were climbing through the passageway back to Hogwarts.

* * *

Harry and Co. arrived at the Lake gasping for air, but as soon as Harry's eyes zoned in on Draco Malfoy, he was off running again. Fear was coursing through him- he didn't know what he'd do if Draco was injured. They hadn't even made up yet because the other boy refused to speak to Harry; even when he apologised this morning- okay Draco said he was angry- but he seemed so dead that Harry didn't believe him. When Harry kissed him the second time, did Draco feel nothing? 

"Draco-?"

Surprisingly enough, the blonde appeared to be the only one conscious; kneeling and staring at his hands with a faraway expression. Both Pansy and Blaise were strewn on the floor, in front of the Lake. Pansy's arm was bent at an uncomfortable angle and there was blood all over the right side of her face. Blaise was lying face down and seemed unharmed aside from tattered robes and a few grazes. 

Walking around them, Harry knelt down next to him and calmly asked what happened; he could see his friends standing just a little off, clearly giving him privacy. 

There was no answer for a while, but eventually Draco open his mouth. He never looked at Harry as he spoke, "I was clearing my head- just walking by the Lake. A-and, I don't know if they were going to provoke me- I don't even know if they noticed me," he gave a wry laugh, "but I saw both of them bantering so blissfully and I couldn't help but be furious that they were so happy when I was just...I guess I wasn't allowing myself to really live."

"You were too hung up on the past," Harry said with understanding and Draco finally looked up- grey eyes hopeful and awed- making him falter for a second,"I had trouble letting go and forgiving myself as well Draco, but you should know that to the people who care about you- those who matter- you already are," he smiled hopefully. Draco's eyes welled up and he flung himself at Harry, gasping as their bodies came into contact.

"Harry, Harry I'm sorry."

"It's fine," he reassured, patting Draco's platinum hair, "but we're good now...right?"

Draco nodded enthusiastically, his face was no longer blank, but had a content sheen to it; his eyes were filled with life and promise that had been absent for a long time. Harry found himself falling onto his back, with Draco's face buried in his neck and his hair covering his nose- filling Harry's senses with it's fruity smell. He felt light and consequently started giggling, pulling Draco's face up to meet his.

After staring appreciatively, his eyes trailed down to the slim, pink lips in front of him and Harry's mouth opened distractedly. Draco was focused, however, and he moved so there was a mere few centimetres between them. As he hesitated, Harry connected their mouths and almost groaned in relief. Wet lips sliding together was all Harry could think about, and all he wanted was to get closer and be consumed. 

This kiss wasn't like the first two, this was slow and full of a tenderness that squeezed his heart. 

**Epilogue**

Swinging hands, the two boys strolled through the hallway; they had N.E.W.Ts just around the corner and whilst Harry was openly freaking out, Draco was trying to keep a cool facade. 

"Remind me why Weasley is coming again?"

Somehow Draco had agreed to let Harry's red haired friend come along to one of his tutoring sessions, supposedly because they needed to 'play nice'. Harry kept complaining that even though they'd been dating for several months, he and Ron still refused to come to any sort of truce.

"Because he's my best friend, and you're my boyfriend," Harry pecked his cheek, hoping it would help his argument, "and I want you to get along and get over this pointless animosity between you guys."

Draco rolled his eyes but said nothing else against it; if Harry wanted a truce then he'd have to cool Ron's red hot temper. 

His _boyfriend_ (Merlin that was so satisfying to say) nudged him and whispered, "Look."

That he did, and he saw Zabini and Parkinson just turning the corner in front of them. After that night at the beginning of the year, the two never harassed Draco again. They were a little wary of him after he cast an explosion spell at them and caused them some injuries, to do much harm. Draco had no idea if they'd gone to Madame Pomfrey or not, and if they did, he didn't know what they'd told her because he'd never gotten in trouble. That night was kept from the knowledge of anyone else by an unofficial agreement, but that didn't mean that every one was getting off scot-free.

As soon as Neville woke up he told the tale of how he was just walking back to his dormitory when he heard a _'Serpensortia'_ and then there was a snake diving at him, relentlessly nipping at him, then black. A simple _'Prior Incantato'_ and the culprits- Zabini and Parkinson- were caught. Being adults (and former Death Eater sympathisers) they went on trial at the Ministry. Neville and Harry testified, both agreeing that no major harm was done and that they didn't want the two to have their futures ruined because of silly prejudices and school yard nemesis'. They'd gotten off with a week in Azkaban and wand confiscation for five years, or until further notice. Considering they'd been allowed to finish at Hogwarts, Draco thought that was pretty generous. 

The two parties regarded each other for a moment, before continuing on their separate ways. Harry smiled affectionately at his boyfriend and enclosed an arm around his waist. He really was quite proud of how Draco stood up for himself after being pushed around for so long. 

They found their regular spot, in a secluded corner of the library, and waited for Ron. 

Harry resorted to staring at Draco as he sorted his books; he really was completely and utterly wonderful. He hurriedly looked away when he was caught looking, blushing red.

Draco smirked, Harry was just so wonderful; he was patient and kind and he made Draco feel like he could be redeemed. His father no longer plagued him too.

He quietened for a moment, then his smirk turned evil.

"Hey Harry?" He moved closer and his fingers trailed along the other's arm.

"Yeah?"

"It appears that the Weasel will be a while, so," his grin widened at Harry's intrigued expression- libido clearly awoken.

"What?" Harry's voice was breathy and he was inching closer to Draco. 

Draco climbed onto Harry's lap- he really was getting worked up and he could feel Harry was too- and stroked his boyfriend's neck. Resting his lips against his ear, he whispered, "I thought we could have a little fun."

With that, he nibbled Harry's ear and the boy gasped, hands flying down to grip Draco's bum. The blonde continued his assault of Harry's face; biting his lobe, nibbling his jaw, mapping out strong cheekbones with his tongue and devouring plump lips.

Both boys were snogging each other's faces off, moaning and gasping. Harry shoved a hand up the pale boy's shirt, massaging his hardened nipples, whilst the other hand slipped in between Draco's arse cheeks.

Draco was a complete mess, and all he could do was grind their crotches together as he slopped his tongue around Harry's mouth, "Uh, uh- Harry!"

"What the bloody hell?!" 

Ron was finally here, and Harry was blushing and trying to push Draco off, who was unabashedly still straddling him. Draco's pants were halfway down his bum and his shirt was crinkled and partially opened, but he looked murderous. Ron slowly went to sit on the other side of the table.

Draco was so painfully hard, and he knew he was getting no relief anytime soon. He got up, hastily fixing his clothes, "Are you fucking serious Weasley?" He screeched and advanced towards him, "I'm trying to get along with you but you make it so bloody difficult..." Draco brought his fists up to the red head's face, but, with great restraint, brought them back to his sides. The blonde stormed away and sat next to Harry, who put a hand comfortingly on his knee. Despite his boyfriend's good intentions, this only made him more agitated. 

Ron was his best friend, but right now that was getting increasingly difficult to remember. Harry watched Draco out of the corner of his eye; his face was still flushed and his pupils were wide with lust. Harry moved his hand up higher and heard Draco suck in a deep breath, encouraged, he continued stroking a path from the edge of his boyfriend's crotch to mid-thigh. Draco was shaking so much by now with repressed desire that he'd dropped his quill and gripped the edge of the table. 

Harry hadn't noticed, nor did he care, if Ron was watching. He got his answer, "Clearly I'm cock-blocking you mate, so we'll, um, do this another day," he gathered up his things and left without another word. 

Draco was laughing- Weasley just looked so uncomfortable, "Did you see his face Harry?" He asked between giggles, "I think he'd have rather seen McGonagall naked then us going at it!"

Harry rolled his eyes, feeling restless, "Yes, yes, hilarious," he scrunched up his face, "ugh, did you really have to mention McGonagall naked- aargh!"

He rubbed his eyes forcefully, until he saw black spots and forgot what his point was again.

"How about _me_ naked, Harry?" Draco moaned into his ear, and Harry suddenly remembered the point very well. He smirked, "I thought you wanted to talk about Ron and his face?"

Draco scowled mockingly, "Oh sod off, Potter," he then lunged at Harry, knocking him to the floor, and started attacking him with touches and kisses.


End file.
